Wednesday, June 29, 2005

The next Apprentice? or maybe not

"You all know i'm not exactly "outgoing". But i had kinda convinced myself to apply to be on the next season of the apprentice, after all how many 18 year old business men are there? So entries close on the 1st of July right, but apprently i'm too young, :( So looks like i'm left with Big Brother.
Marks BBQ got washed out, as far as i know, unless there was a secret mission to get me out of the mix. If so you planners can revel in the fact that i got loads done today.
Anyways the usual standard day, hope you like z Quote, i might mess around with the sites design in the next few days and show my slick/sick skills. If your wondering why, cause i can, the motto of any self respecting geek. Take care till tomorrow.

Quote of the Day
"Computer hackers are often limited by conventional computer hardware. They may request "faster" video cards, and larger hard drives, or even more memory. If your son starts requesting these devices, it is possible that he has a legitimate need. You can best ensure that you are buying legal, trustworthy hardware by only buying replacement parts from your computer's manufacturer."

An article i found 'Digging' titled "Is your son a Computer Hacker"

Monday, June 27, 2005

Skype's cool

The clan got together to slag off each other via skype. which was a lot of fun especially as mike didn't have a mic. Anyways the Clan Cast looks like its gonna happened, so I'll send ya all the link when it happens.
Anyways charlottes off to Cyprus, so enjoy, if you wanna see that picture of her I told you about look here.
Pretty standard day otherwise I graced the shores of ACS with my presence which I'll do again tomorrow, but with a bit more work ethic, and better dressed, :).
My favorite site on the web Engadget has been down, for a while at least on my end of the world, I miss it so.
Well unless you folk wanna see pictures of my vomit, CYA tomorrow. Oh and in case your wondering what that is the picture, thats my PC's with all the lights turned on and the real lights turned off, :).

Quote of the Day
Rob "is it true your brother only has 4 fingers on one hand"
David "Yeah, he's got one finger for a thumb"
Rob "Awhh let's see"

The fascinations provided by the human body.

Sunday, June 26, 2005

Part V: The Geek Strikes back

So lets skip forward a couple years from last time, well actually more like three years. Never the less, I continue, Stanley Tech was my ummm, 5th school. You can see its location here.
It was my first school in the UK, for a while, so it was a bit of a change. Hearing plain English(if you call south London slang that?) Anyways I started midway though year 9, so I had to hit the ground running. Now if you remember last week, I said that the Jamaican educational system keeps its students about 2 years ahead of UK students, well I never really had to hit the ground. Remember "SATS" tests. I did them after being at the school for about a fortnight! Got 6 6 6(no anti-Christ jokes please!), with basically no work or revision. I basically wasted the rest of year 9 doing nothing but making friends, Good times. Well when your really good at something, that should never be a reason for you to stop. Cause I just got lazy, and soon that two years of "excess" knowledge was forgotten and I was a mere mortal again. Year 10 was great, sorta. The Cool reputation I had began to build up in year 9, got squashed when I got into a fight(I never actually did anything, hence the destruction of the reputation). So I had to hang with the Geek crowd. Here's a new word for ya all "Neek"(Geek + Nerd= Neek) you might have heard me use it once or twice. Anyways I started to hang around with my friend Gary, who to this day is proberly one of best friends, although I haven't spoken to him in a while. So were was I, Loser crowd, that was the people I was hanging with, and yes I was a "loser" too. Nah, we were all good people we just didn't want "roll", and sell weed in school.
I wouldn't call Stanley rough, it wasn't that bad, if your a "Neek" and just do dumb stuff your gonna get beaten up, but where is that any different? So me, Gary, Simon, Mark, Ian and Kevin just messed about, and studied and ate Gary out of house and home, Gotta love cookies.... It was interesting causeIi had two sets of friends really, especially towards the end(year 11) I had my cool, platted Black "mates"(there weren't really my friends but its nice to be in the inn crowd every now and then) and Gary and friends.
Now most of you know as a fairly funny guy(I go on what I'm told!) well back then I wasn't funny at all. I got beaten up when I told jokes, I still do, never tell me to tell a joke, its not pretty. Sarcasm is my boat, but when you try to take the piss out of physically bigger kids in local gangs, its just not funny, strange. Anyway I only really gave up trying to tell jokes when I left year 11, cause I had given up trying to be funny, it was obviously genetically limited to one sibling, my brother. Lets move away from my comedic development, cause I'm still no Bernie Mack.
Ever wonder why I failed my maths GCSE the first time round? Well we had this teacher called Mr. Ashraf. Legend. He always made this queer jokes and they were so funny, and its not his fault, but I just spent my top set maths lessons laughing, making crap out of paper, and arguing with Ian(not my geek friend) if you ever wanna see my GCSE maths book just ask, I think I used about 20 pages for the whole year, and a lot of those were just the date and heading.
Moving house, is always hard for the children right. Well when we moved from London to lovely Hemel, I had to still go to school in London. To put that in context for ya, look at this map. See hemel, see where croydon is. 100 miles return! Every day, Monday to Friday. I woke up at 5:30am! Every morning and got home around 8pm. I had no life, just, school and sleep. It got so bad that I had a mini nervous breakdown Christmas 2002, went psycho, tried to walk from St. Albans to Hemel at 7pm at night. Stressful. That's when I got my PDA, and it and God are the only things that kept me sane for the next 6 months. It still surprises me that I got any GCSE's. And no it wasn't p0rn on my PDA that kept me sane, it was news and trying to program an excel spreadsheet to work like Championship manager, I never did quite figure it out. I'm still recovering mentally now, my mum wanted me to go to Watford grammar I told her that if I had to take a bus or a train to go to school I might go one morning and not come back, so that's why I came to Astley, and I don't regret it(come back next week and see what I say :))
Damn, I just looked at what I've written, a bit too much lets wrap up
So my best moments, ok

  • Becoming a prefect

  • The days when I still walked to school

  • My stalling, before a fight, coward at work, I'm lover not a fighter(not that I'm good at either)

  • Get my first mobile, Nokia 3310 remember that anyone?

  • Getting cramp running for the train

  • Missing my stop and ending up at gatwick airport

  • Being allowed to come in late every day for a year

  • Being sorta independent, on a enclosed train

  • Teasing Gary about being gay(he's not but its funny to get on his nerves)

Next week "ACS: uncovered"

Quote of the Day
my mum "I need a little business or something to do"
me "like what?"
my mum "something that pays well and doesn't involve to much work"
me "Drug dealing, I hear that popular, and you can make good money, Tax free too"

Work suggestions for my mum

Saturday, June 25, 2005

What does "Skeet" mean?

Ever heard that song by lil Jon ,the scourge of the music industry, Get Low. Well there's a line in it that goes..
"All these b***he's crawl (Crawl)
Y'all skeet skeet motherf****s"
Y'all skeet skeet"

Well a recent Dave Chappelle skit brought "skeet" to my attention. And I discovered that I didn't actually know what it meant. At first I thought it meant..
"A form of trapshooting in which clay targets are thrown from traps to simulate birds in flight and are shot at from different stations."

But that doesn't fit in with the context of the song, So a search ensued. After finding interesting forum full of racist banter, I came across the real meaning of the word. I'm not gonna put want it means on the actual site, but you can feel free to look here to see what it means. Interesting isn't it.

Anyways apart from that little discovery a plain old day, so keep your sk**t to your self and take care till tomorrow.

Quote of the Day
Me "Chris Tucker isn't gonna do rush hour 3"
Scott "Why?"
Me "Cause he's a Christian now."
Josh "Why can't he just un-christen himself?"

Josh's take on Religion and how deeply it should be involved in ones life


Mike tries to make up his mind, Burger or tits...

Evening, so for not turning up at school today. I got all chav'd up, then I sat on my bed and fell asleep... So sorry {waves}. Anyway its been fairly slow day, saw the new freaks join the Big Brother House, gotta love those folks, or not. The worst bit, is don't we all know someone we could compare them all too. (I'm not Derek, last warning!!!!). Hope you like the picture, I've Been wanting to post it for ages, but kept forgetting, infected its older than my Blog, April 13. And if Charlotte reads this blog, I have your picture slightly "modified", all well and safe :).
I recorded the first Confessions of a Geek Podcast tonight, its ok, I just play music really and don't actually talk about anything, so just as well I decided to quit it, lol. In case you didn't hear I'm quitting it to start a Clan confessions Cast, with the members of HHE.
Anyways take care all

"Take the cucumber, so I can stick it up my F***y."

Big Brother newbie, Kinga's take on acceptable uses for vegetables

Friday, June 24, 2005

So you think your a tough guy? .... YEP!

This is great, there's this site that I frequent know of where you can get illegal files etc. Well below is page that the site's owner setup to show all the letters and emails he's got from big company's and such. What made me laugh is the graph at the bottom of letters and such.

Just scroll to the bottom of the page

Make sure you read some of the emails, like this one.

Once again proves what great stuff you can Digg up.

30 hours+

That's right folks I decide to not sleep, why, don't know. But what I do know is that John Legend's album is class. And no I didn't bit-torrent it. Anyways a feel a bit better after my no sleep session. Turns out I got something like an ear infection, its doesn't hurt but I just walk like a drunk, so I guess my body is making up for lost time. Anyways I should be in school today, so I'll see you folks there. Later

Quote of the Day
"The Gentleman is current lacking an abode"

Ever wonder how to refer to Homeless folk while remaining Politically correct?

Wednesday, June 22, 2005

Whats up

Ever wonder if North Korean had Nukes, i think this little pic might just prove it. You never know what you might digg up on the net.

Where've you been?


Theres a brief summary of my last 24 hours. Sorry that theres been no posts, but its kinda hard to type when your in A & E. Anyway after being prodded, poked, pumped, and sqeezed, i'm ok. Not sure what i'm suffering from but i'm not in pain, just dizzy.
Well as i don't feel quite wonderful, i'm not keen on writing masses... But if your interested i got a picture of my stomach contents in a bucket :), i might post that one later,{wonder if it had anything to do with that 5 scoop ice-cream).
Anyway now that my schooling (bar uni) is essentially over now, its podcast time, pitty my head feels like crap. So i'm gonna start putting together the stuff for the podcast tomorrow, as i'm still taking it easy today. I'll send a promo to my lovely Podcasting friend Adam, to get the word out about the show, I'll also send one to Kobe Beef(see right). And yes dan your still welcome to come round, to do the cast, alternatively we can skype it, cause i know ur a lazy child/young man.

Well take care all, i'll cya later

Quote of the Day
Nurse "I need to inject this in your bottom"
Me "Ok, so far down does it need to go"
Nurse gives me a weird look
Me "I mean how much of my clothes to i need to take off"

Don't you just hate people sticking things in your ass

Monday, June 20, 2005

Back in day, Part 4: Learning to Spell "Jamaica"

Its 1996-ish, I'm still at that lovely place, in Brixton. One day my mum comes in asks me, "Jonathan, how would you like to live in Jamaica?", you'll never guess what I said. 5 Minutes later I had my suitcases out and was packing. I kinda thought it was a holiday, I found this wasn't the situation, took a couple of years though.
So in September 96 I went off to Jamaica. My Headmaster at my old school actually begged my mother not to move me, I would say thanks, but I can't remember her name, lol, but thanks anyway. There I lived with My grandparents, (on my Mum's side). I went to a school, in the hills above where I lived called Torrado Heights preparatory School, that's a mouthful. Anyhow I was there from year 3(I should have been in year 4, but I failed the year's entry exam, lol) till year 5(I skipped year 6 :)). First off I imagine your confused by the whole year skipping thing. In Jamaica you have to take an exam to get into Secondary School, Called the "Common Entrance" exam. If you fail it you have to repeat the final year, this exam is by no means easy, and I knew about 4 people that did fail it and had to repeat. The trick was that there was a minimum age of 11, so even if you were in year 6, but under 11 you had till wait to next year. So I was old enough to go in year 4 when I started at the school, but I failed a maths test(this would happen again later in life). So cause I could add and subtract fractions at 7 I had to go into into year 3. I was then one of the oldest kids in the year.
Now where as in the UK, I had always been in the upper 10% of students in my year, this was no longer the case. Even though I was a year behind my age group, I was still about another year behind the Jamaica curriculum.. So technically there where 5 old's with more ability than me at 7. Cause of this fact I had to work my arse off in the later years. But for my entire time in Jamaica I rarely ever got grades above D-C. But I was still smarter than the average English child my age. And this isn't the case only in Jamaica, most Black countries curriculum are a lot more advanced than the UK's, Stuff like Pure maths, and other A-level like stuff, is done in year 10 and 11! There were even elements of subjects I did in year 5 that were A-Level maths! Education wasn't free like it is over here, however it wasn't that expensive either, My school was another private school, and the fees were about $7500(Jamaican dollars), which sounds like a lot, right. Well back then it was about £100 a term, now its more like £70. Compared to thridiculousus fees here its pretty cheap, along with the cheaper cost of living, it made growing up there pretty easy. I used to get $100 in pocket money a weekthat'sts £1.50. I could a whoa lotlot with that, example, Drinks cost $2I, i could get a whole chicken dinner(2 pcs of chicken, rice and salad) for $80. Can't beat devalued currency.
Well really this post could go on for ages, bI'mi'm sum up some of the big highlights of my first 3 years Jamaicaica.
      RealiziIg i was stupid, sorta

      Meeting one my best friends ever, Tariq(though he's got Asianian name, he's actually white, and from Canada.)

      Getting my first Computer (Intel 486 66mhz, 32Mb ram, 1Gb HDD, Windows 95, the size of a small fridge!)

      Buying my first(of 2) CD(compilation album by various Jazz and soul artists, the most recent track on it was published in 1987!)

      Getting my first and only E-mail address(9 years old and counting)

      Cheating on my Maths moIk(i got 87%, the giIl i copied got 92I) i admitted after about 2 hours, lol

      Getting my first bike, Green, 7 speed

      Introduction mosquito'stos, and Boils.

      Seeing the GiIl i was infatuated with do a table dance, that was nice...(it was legit, no peeping tom crap here!)

Before you aI'mi'm not gonna answer many questions on that last one, but that has to be the best one of all.
Anyway another chapter in my life closed, one final one left, my last Schootechnicallylly by the tiIe i write It i can do the latest chapter the "Astley years", might leave that one a while, got a loose end(or twI) i need to tie up before then. I just thought after this seriIs i might talk about all the "girls"(sI'mi'm nDerekrek!I) i fancied, why, who they where(not thIt i have pictures), and what happen. However there are a few issues involved, might save those ones for the Podcast.
Take care till tomorrow.

Hyde park in all it's 35 degree glory

Sentinel Point, Home of the Rich, and extremely loaded, who strangely can only afford to live in South London.

The itty bitty moon

Sunday, June 19, 2005

Livin' in Londn'

Evening folks, l'm in the car on my way to Croydon.

12:37- So far Josh thought you get a train from Euston to Brixton, Hard considering Brixton is in the south and all outbound Land line trains go North! Scott almost got a ticket, I told the taffic warden the law, which only pissed him off further. Fortunately he found in his heart to let us off, so thank you Mr. Sodji.

12:55- We all just ate, Patties and Dumplins, well the latter was for Josh. We're actually going shopping now.

3:39- Shopping complete. Got a pair of trainers , Nike air's i think. Josh and me bought two massive Ice-creams, 5 scoops for 2.99! We're off to Scott's flat to get his stuff before we go back to Hertfordshire.

5:41- Several games of pro later we now actually going home now. Got a couple things on my mind, sorta work/attitude, strange but true.

12:01- I'm off to me bed, Pics to come 2morrow Cya

Friday, June 17, 2005

I think i might faint, catch me...

Even after yesterday i'm still feeling faint, which i think is normally a bad sign. I'm struggling to stand up right quite often. No i haven't been smoking. I think i might need to a little sugar boost.
So dan wants to join me on da Podcast, thats cool, i gonna record a test show fairly soon, and see how it goes. I got lots of topics, i just need to cut out my Damn "i'm on Air" american accent.
I'm spending my whole day in the LDN(London), going shopping for trainers, so the nice torn blue ones are going bye bye.
I set up our clan server today, not sure if its working properly yet, but we'll see how that goes.
I'm getting lazy with the entries, no links, more pictures, hey if you like it that way, far enough, but with this dizzy spell i got going on at the spec i can't be asked to put much more.
Well enjoy your saturday, cause i'm gonna enjoy mine, cya later.

Oh yeah, nice link for ya all, about the dangers of drunken purchases, enjoy.

Quote of the Day
"DJ gave me a message to give ya, he said to give you a disk and tell you to change some stuff for him, but that was last week, and i can't remember if he said anything else"

Steph's world class messaging abilities

So you liked the movie face off

Thursday, June 16, 2005

The slow day

Its been a nice slow day. I was meant to fix a couple of computers, my I felt like crap, this morning(almost fainted) so that was one load off me. I've been at home all day long, so its been fairly quiet and entertainment has been fairly limited, to girl on girl kissing in Big brother, I don't really like that sort of stuff(honest), but they looked like they were gonna swallow each other, so I thought I'll see it through.
Next week I plan to start my long awaited Podcast. I plan to call it "Confessions of a Geek" or "COG". It will be about, just about anything, if you wanna star in it I don't mind having some folk around for the premier.
tomorrow(Friday) I shall be gracing the 6th form presence in a formal get-up. Shoes and all sorts, hopefully it will work out, I'm not good with semi-casual, if I'm honest so I'll give it a shot.
Finally after working on my new website, I have to start all over again, sorta. To make the page act the way I want it too, I have to go back and edit about 20+ pages, carefully move bits around, all to make the page be centred in the browser, when its maximized. :( What I do recognition. Take care till tomorrow.

Quote of the Day
"When it comes to money, I'm like a Cactus with water; You know its in there, but your gonna have a hard time getting it out"

My latest personal quote of choice

Wednesday, June 15, 2005

I'm so tired

Right, just felt really dizzy, not sure why. Anyway, they all suddenly realized that there are all backstabber in Big Brother, surprise surprise.
Hopefully Hannah, calmed down, I'm sure Amy(not who you think) is a lovely person, in person. I'm really knackered, so I'm sorry if you came over looking for some "quality" content, but its not here, lol. Oh Dan's obsessed with p0rn and likes Soapy *** W****,( I wanna keep the child friendly aspect of my site). Nothing like a little discrimination. I got my file server(geek stuff), and it rocks. COD should get even better now, 0 ping in my own server......
So about that little day dream, my exam went ok, (kinda good in a sorta ok way). I thought about going to Visarge or what ever the hell its called nowadays, but I can't be asked(my mum wouldn't yet me).
Finally we need some better crap on UK TV, MJ's free, Derek shops at the same place I do, I'm gonna burn all my clothes! Oh yeah, and I got lost in Grove hill, for about 10 minutes :) Cya later.

Quote of the Day
Hanna "If dave's not married by the time he's 25 he'll marry me, If miles isn't married by the time he's 25 he'll marry me, but if I'm not married by the time I'm 25 I'll marry Dave"

Does this Qualify as an Arranged marriage, or is it to complicated, Hanna's love life exposed.

Tuesday, June 14, 2005


I got a big exam tomorrow morning so i'm gonna got to bed to now, its english. Plus it's my second to last exam. Thats about it tonight, i'm getting lazy with the posting, but i'm sure you guys can't be bother to read the mass of "crap" that i write every night, so just as well. Wish me luck, cya later

Quote of the Day
Me "What was this Bloke's name?"
Viki/Vicky/Victora "Money"
Me "So he's a chav named money"
Viki/Vicky/Victora "Well i broke his heart"
Me "Just as well, at least your not a Gold-digger"

Money, Money, Money, must be funny, in Viki's world

"i wish i was a little bit taller"

"I don't hang with happy people, westside!"

Touch the Black guy for luck

Monday, June 13, 2005

Amazing what these modern gadgets can do

Evening folks, knacked again. Not cause I've done a lot, but because of those damn Hayfever pills. Usual day really, it's really starting to hit home that I'm finishing school, scary plus anyone wanna give a genius(semi-ish)a job, please, lol. Anyway I decided to empty all the pictures on my phone, so here's what I got, enjoy. Anyways that's about it for tonight. In case you missed it you can see Part 3 of the back in the day series here. Take care till tomorrow, cya.(Trudi, I'll post your pics tomorrow, thanks)

Oh and before I forget, ever wanted to remind your self, or tell yourself something in the future, this site gives you the opportunity to do so

Quote of the Day
Me "Look Vicky, it's a Black Hole"
{she turns in the direction I point to}
Vicky/Victora/Viki "arh, you.."

Vicky's amazing intelligence at work, In her defence she's actually smarter than me

TAG on stage, and Dan's shadow.

What can i say... he's drunk

Our little trip to the pub

I Beat Josh, ha ha ha Proof on the net for all to see

Trunley bench-pressing Liam, those are dave legs, he works out.

Is it the Sun or the Moon, you decide!

Could i get closer to the Camera

"It looks like its been driven by a Boy Racer"

The lovely GMTV presenters showing, you don't have to be Black to have an Afro(See the high quality of my TV, anymone wanna donate :))

Tiff at his most Gay ever

Look, no shoes

Back in day, Part 3: The cake out

The year is 1993, I'm 4 foot something, thin as a twig, I liked to call this time in my life, "when I got fat". After leaving Shaftsbury, my mum decided that she wanted us in a slightly safer environment, far-away from old white guys with long eyebrows. This place happened to be literary far away too. Theodore McClarey was a Seven Day-Adventist private school in Brixton(home of the thug, land of the drug dealer). It was ok, the sad thing about it was that it was only primary, so my beloved brother was left to go elsewhere. Anyway this is one the more routine bits of my life. Nothing much happened, apart from one thing, I got fat.
you've been Caked

At this lovely place we had a cook name Mrs. Burell(ber-rell). This lady could really cook, and best of all she made really good cake. So how did I get my hands on this cake, you ask? Well at the time my mum was studying at college for a degree in something or ano
ther(she's got about 10 different qualifications, lol), so she had to go in the evenings, plus she worked about 10 miles away. As a result she could never pick me up after school, While my brother went to school to far away to pick me up in time too. So every evening I had to wait at school for about 2=3 hours before I could go home. They had set-up an after school club for students like me, but by the time my mum got I was always the last one. Well in this after school club, we got to eat the left overs of the school dinners, for snacks. There were sausages, sandwiches, but what I wanted was the cake, with custard, and I got it, usually twice or three times a day. As you can imagine three portions of cake a day, 5 days a week for over a year... You do the math.
So with that I was fat, and I would stay that way for more than 10 years. Sad, maybe but I ate a lot of good food along the way. That's the strange thing, most people who are fat end up being like that this way, one period in your life, and then kaput, you are the Michelin man reincarnated.
Rockin n' rollin

Away from that major issue, I was pretty much the star student in my year again at this school. Not sure why I was so naturally smart, cause all I did was watch the Swat cats, and Jonny quest on cartoon network, ah those were the days. So anyways, I returned to being a goodie two shoes as my brother wasn't around to influence my actions, so no bunking, "graphin", or football. We had a tiny playground, so footie wasn't really an option, so that's partially why I'm so crap at football.
Well that pretty much wraps up another section of my life, part four comes next week, sorry for the late posting, I was too tired to write/type last night. Part four should be about how I ended up in Jamaica. Cya later

Oh I've never been good at maths, but here's a nice equation for ya number crunchers
you've been Caked+Homer=Rockin n' rollin

Saturday, June 11, 2005

I'm in Google, sorta

hi there, my day started with a phone call from my brother, somehow, someway he thought i was meant to go and meet him in Croydon aka the getto's of South London. But he had kinda failed to tell me that we were going in the first place, oh well. We went downtown and he brought himself a new phone, i got a magzine and we left Josh behind, lol.
So you read the above paragraph, and thought what does that have to do with the title, well yesterday i googled my full name, and i'm 5th from the top, whoo, unfortunately my first name or just my surname still doesn't turn up any results that relate to me. You might also notice some other references to me in the stated search, those are my news group postings, where i "try" to help people with technical questions.
The post is cut down, and slightly crap, my apologies, oh how i wish had a Podcast... Anyway i still hate derek from bb, and i'm nothing like him, the good weekend post comes tomorrow, you'll all be too drunk to read this when you get back from your nights out, cya all tomorrow.

Quote of the Day
Josh "You got spare cables right?"
Me "Nah, thought you had them"
Josh "You should have called me, oh yeah you had my phone"

The demise of our usual saturday Pro session

All Tanked up on benadryl, and nowhere to go

Good day folks, Well it might have been for you, but for me, it wasn't that great. My physics exam went down the toilet as expected, I apologize for wasting my fellow tax payer's money. Plus I was late to the exam, mainly cause I spent a little extra time to tank up on that great stuff known as benadryl.
Benadryl Allergy Relief starts working in just 15 minutes and lasts up to 8 hours. Which means you can experience all the joys of summer without the tears of hayfever.

What pisses me off is where's the bit about, "after 8 hours you'll feel like crap and need to have a nap to feel normal again." So anyways, I got Jade's network up and running, sort of, funny thing is I did what I needed to do last time I was there, but didn't wait long enough for it to work itself out, so by the time I came back today if was working fine, LOL, stupid but true. I tried to introduce her to Podcasting, I imagine she now thinks I'm some what of a freak, but hey you win some you lose some.
My big news of the day, or at least what was meant to be my big news, failed to materialize. This was my little trip to the cinema with a acquaintance of mine. Unfortunately "stuff" came up and it never happened, of well there's always next week I guess/hope. Contrary to what some people think I'm not depressed by the situation, I don't have a stiff drink to my right, and a fully loaded glock to my left. I just happen to like her a lot, and am a little jarred by the lack of progress(which in many ways is my own fault, LOL). Well let me not bore you anylonger with the state of love life, and or lack of it.
At this moment in time I don't know whether MJ got locked up or not, I don't really know if he's guilty or not, but I hate to see talented people go to waste. In other news, not.
I think that's about it, I find I'm starting to fix more and more computers, my plans for world domination are coming together, ha ha ha ha ha, sorry, got bored. Finally Dan asked, why I put so many links in my posts and what was the point of them. Well as my life is fairly routine, I decide to spice up your reading of it by linking certain words to different things around the net that are either funny within the context of what I'm talking about, or just relate to stuff that I'm talking about. I do it all for you :). Example, the line "lack of a love life" links to Virgins website, see the connection.... Interesting experiment for ya, try googling virgin, that's what I call a web-monopoly, Well done Richard Branson, Legend.
To wrap up here's a fairly interesting video I found, no its not p0rn, so sorry Dan and mike maybe next time, but it is freaky. I think I might start doing a link of the day too, but they will get boring as I only read tech stuff, pretty much. Plus I'm gonna try and shorten down the posts, getting a little silly now, don't you think... Remember its part 3 of the Back in the day series this Sunday, so take care everyone till tomorrow, cya

Quote of the Day
Me "Lets tie Charlotte up, put a funnel in her mouth and pour random crap down her throat"
Charlotte"Jon, shut up and get laid"

My love affair with Charlotte continues

Thursday, June 09, 2005

Being prepared, or at least trying

Well my physics revision went really well, not. I think i'm really gonna fail it tomorrow, and no i'm not getting nervous, when you look at an exam paper and can't remember how to anwser anything till you get to page 4, its a real bad thing. Well maybe i ought to read this before tomorrow. Oh well, maybe physics just isn't my calling, niether is anything with numbers, writting, and hard work, ummm, maybe not then. Imagine if you would, a world without numbers...
As usual i sat in front of Blu-ray, and surfed the net, most of the day, i did actually try to revise, but when its not going in, its just not going in.
In other non exam related news, i popped round Alan's aka the "Pirate", to have a look at his computer, as i do, no my way home i bumped into the legend himself(Phil) feeling the effects of hayfever, like myself, damn itching eyes!! Anywho, he was with one of my "Fans" Trudi,who for some strange reason actually reads this converlooted page, good on ya, so a special shout out to her and Nik who i know drops in every now and then, and Daniel, and any other regular readers that i have. So as i was saying, they(Phil and Trudi) were off to see Mr. and Mrs. smith, at the our local cineplex. Hope it was good, cause i should be going tomorrow, who with i hear you ask, oh no one...
Ever wonder what your name means, i did, so i went to this site. It said
Idealistic concepts and rather spiritual issues. Accordingly, it is a number with potentials that are somewhat more difficult to live up to.

They obviously heard about my 6 a-levels and ridicous multi-tasking, if that doesn't quite do it for ya you can do your birthday as well. The birthday ones are quite interesting, afterall i never i was 575 Billion seconds old.

Finally, the people in Big Bother are still weird, i'm not like derek, trust me, or i'll hurt you(or at least try)! I hope you like clowns, cause even if you don't i'm gonna show you some, ha ha ha ha, "I'll be back... Tommorrow, lol"
Attack of the Clowns

Quote of the day
Me "Hi mum"
My mum "Can you do me favour please"
Me "Depends what it is.."
My mum "Can you water my Garden"
Me "Are you having a laugh, its 10.30 at night"

One of thousands of examples of my mum taking the mickey

Wednesday, June 08, 2005

My room's alive with the sound of music

Remember how i said yesterday, that i think i might be doing too much, well i decided to add some more on my plate. Well sort of, I spent most of this afternoon/evening playing about with music productiion tools/programs, and i had a great time, most fun i've had in ages, eventhough Ejay crashed on me three times, in the middle of production. I made a couple of tracks, sorry no rapping here if you were getting excited. I discovered this great track on Sony's free ACID xpress 5.0 called "Time to Fly", which by itself looks like a great program, pitty i haven't got time to play around with the software more. As i stopped using P2P to get my music about 6 months ago(HA HA RIAA, no lawsuit here bitches), i think i might just make all the music i want from now on, strange, prehaps even weird but different.

Alass i degress, it was pretty the usual type of day, wonderful weather as is usual. It was good day, we laughed, we teased, we got bored, the way any school day should be. Tommorrow i'm staying home to revise for my fantasic Physics exam, which is on friday morning, yip pee. Pitty, cause i had plans, but hopefully they can wait for a little while...hopefully not to long... Anyway back to real life, the whole clan(minus senor philp), had a great little gaming session, which was good, as usual i totally pwn. The the "pwnage" note, guess whats at, the Pure Water Network, lol.

Lastly to complete my post, i want to confirm that anyone who dares to compare me to Derek from BB, will either be beaten up or insulted(hear that vicky/viki/Victora. This is the last and offical warning, plus i'm not camp, considering afterall i like girls, and good looking ones at that. So i hope that we got that situation cleared up now.

Offical RSS press release, from now on all ipods are to be know as "Chav-Pods", Someone with a "Chav-pod" is a "Chav-podder". Thank you for your cooperation.

Amy "Don't you like me hugging you"
Me "well I prefer grinding, but this will do"

Need i say anything?

Tuesday, June 07, 2005

Geek overload

Ever wonder what happens when good geeks go bad. Well jade found out today, i installed all her lovely hardware, then failed to get it to work, lol. So now i gotta figure out what the hell i did wrong, i fear that unfortunately it may take me a while, alot to do with IP address and such. Anyway i think i might be doing to much have a look, i'm revising for 3 exams, building three websites, developing 2 software applications, running a business, doing extensive favors, gaming (just a lil bit), making a music video, teaching my self different programming languages, looking for a job, i think thats about it, not including my 4 hours a night of tech article reading, never knew you could get cpu coolers so big. Oh well i guess this is life, hopefully life will look alot better soon.
Anyway i've neglected my beloved blog recently, and i'm sorry blog, forgive me...
In other news, i now hate a large selection of the big brother housemates, don't get me started...
Wardrobe malfunction, lol i love that phrase.
Its dawning on me, slowly i might add, that school really is coming to an end, and the soppy guy that i am, i just wanna say i'm really gonna miss all of you, or at least most of you, (sorry mike, lol). Although i've done it like six times making new friends at uni is gonna be a pain considering a bunch of perfectly good ones already.
Finally you may have noticed that the magical references to the "D quest" have become fewer in recent days. Well its not because i decided it was stupid or cause i decide to quit, i simply forgot, lol. Well actually i knida quit it after i found out(figured it out actually) some information, which turned out to crap(apt, lol) so its back on, the "D" is scheduled for thursday, if i screw it up, look out for one depressed geek.

before i go, Win XP just told me that my page file is too big and it needs more memory, so when i check it out it tells me that with 3 programs open, my page file is 1.2GB's, its usually about .3GB, its not even .6GB when i'm playing COD, dam poorly written software. Oh and sorry the quote of the day is Crap but hey you are kinda prewarned.

Quote of the day
Could someone please shoot them

My requests to the world for a swift end to the lives of certain members of big bother

Sunday, June 05, 2005

Back in the Day: Part 2, Getting Shafted

Well I hope that you all enjoyed part 1:The Cornwall College years. Time for part 2...
My first school was Shaftsbury. It was a Co-ed 5-16 Private School it Purley(south London). Because of the age range, it was the only time I went to the same school as my brother. We were only there for about a year and a half. There were only about 250 or less students so it was never really packed. At the time I was 5.
It wasn't the stereotypical Private school, very multi-cultural and hardly any snobs. I was a very different person then, for one reason or another. I used to do Graffiti(only little bits, :), spoke like an idiot, bunked school etc. This was mainly cause I wanted to live up to the expectations of my peers, Funny though, as it was always an act, I was one the smartest kids in my year, and my brother could write computer programs in C, he made Pong and this bomber game on our old Amstrad.

Heres a summary of the big events during the couple years I was there:
-Throwing a brick into someone's head(Sorry)
-Winning the headmaster's special award
-Losing the award on the bus a couple hours later
-Bunking school
-My first favorite song, Snoop Dogg's Gin n Juice
-Sonic 3, Legendary
-Mr. Gowland's eyebows

So by now you might be wondering why didn't you stay there longer... Well Combination of factors really. 1. My brother had a accident involving a Glass light fitting, and a Football. Basically the staff neglected the fact the it wasn't safe to play football indoors as the lights weren't protected, I'll leave you to figure out the rest. 2. Mr. Gowland had a problem with controlling his urges, I'm not saying he's guilty but he was accused of the same sort of thing MJ is. I actually saw him do some of this stuff, mainly touching young ladies posteriori etc. Anyway my mum and several of the other parents put a case together against the school, and got it shut down, because she was taking legal action against the school me and my brother had to leave in order to not receive further preferential treatment. So that is why I have no real evidence that I ever really went to that school, sad but interesting. Well that was the years 1992 - 1994, ah how time flies.
Next week I think I'll Look at the school I went too after the "Shafted" experience, Its back 2skool tomorrow, yip pee, after 14 years of schooling, I got 7 more days of school... I feel old

Quote of the day
My Mum "Joshua's in hospital"
Me "Why? What happened?"
My mum "He played so much playstation that he got blisters on his fingers, he got an infection and got admitted"

The lesson of why "Jonny" shouldn't have too much fun, I hope all you pwner's read this one.

Saturday, June 04, 2005

Short days, long nights

Good day, one and all.
its quarter too 3 in the morning so i'll make this brief. :)
Although the Pro cup was good it didn't live up to its billing. Only 7 Players turned up. l went out in the first round, wasn't completely my fault. Carl won, but we didn't like the way he did, so we didn't pay him the prize money lol.
My first real site nears completion, unfortunately it won't be done by the time i get back to school.
Incase you ever wondered what exactly Jon does, i run two businesses, Verisys Computers,which sells PC's & Jupiter Media Solutions which is basically a graphic & web design company. I'm not loaded but i make a little cash.
Anyways i gotta write an English Essay today, then it's off to the fair with "everyone". So with such an exciting day i best be off to bed, which i'm already in... :)

too tired to write anymore... Night...

Thursday, June 02, 2005

The Pro Tour

Today(Thursday) is one of the biggest days of the holiday. It the Pro Evolution Soccer 4 Championship. 16 players, 2 TV's, 1 Winner... I haven't practiced, but we all know that it Carlsberg made Pro Evo players they would all be named Jon, and have IQ's of 127(low don't you think?). I don't think I'll win I'm not that good any more but I hope to at least make it to the quarter finals. How tell ya how it goes :)
The Great coding project goes on, I've finished the sites front page, and done most of the other minor stuff, I now have to make the 14! product pages. In case your wondering "does Jon have a life?" the answer is currently no.
Strange as this may sound but I think I came up with this new idea for "people"/women who want Breast Implants, its quite cool, in a non-perv kinda way, and there is no actual implant!, and before you say this isn't my poor excuse to stare at tit's, I got a little more integrity than that. I'll do some research later today.
Finally my apologies for the semi-boring posts(today and yesterday especially), I completely understand why Keith didn't put out a podcast, hard to talk about stuff that's not happening or happened.

I need to get out of my house, I think I'm going stir crazy,

Quote of the day
Chemda "Nothings happened with us for the last 24 hours, so...., we're gonna play stuff that happened to other people"

Today's Keith and the Girl

Wednesday, June 01, 2005

Whooo, bring on wednesday

Its like 1:30 in the morning, and I, Jonathan, am a Legend, Just kidding. Today, we played Football or for our friends across the pond Soccer. All the Outlawz where together, in the same place, at the same time. Anyways, great game it was, Astley vs Adelyfield. I can't remember what the scores where but it was about 5-5 last time i heard. Great game all in all. Fay asked me to mention her, so here you go. Nice to know that people actually wanna be on my site.
I experimented with Podcasting, yet again, i discovered a couple of things,
    1. My life alone, is way to boring for a verbal medium.

    2. I hate the sound of my own voice, i sound like an American!!!

So with that the idea's fading, but i did decide that i would call it the RSS podcast, you'll never guess what the RSS means. However, i might ask me brother if he wants to join in on one, especially as we don't do much together anymore. I imagine it would end up being about sport, :)
Hopefully my beloved business should be moving servers soon, to a nice dedciated server with no crappy advertising, if i do expect the blog to get alot better, i got great plans (visually) for this place.
Today i got a few things to do, revise is at the top of the pile, install jade's wireless network, with her brand spanking new and extremely hackable WRT54G router. Sad i can't keep it, alass, In the evening i should be going out with you know who, for the record i would like to state, that if it doesn't happen its my fault cause i'm a shy idiot. But for one day only i'm a smooth talking, cool guy. and lastly more coding work, i got this cool zooming thing to work on some my pictures, it rocks if i may say.
Well thats it for another day, its 1.55am, i need to sleep so my fingers can rest before i sit my ass back here to hammer out some webpages, Good night, Good Morning, Good Day, Benuos Noche, Benuos Dias etc.

Quote of the day
Adelyfield Team "EEEEZ,EEEEZ,EEEEZ..."
Trunley "Yeah, like your mum"

Dave, getting into our little ACS v Adleyfield game